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Seemingly it’s all very simple. It is: (S+C) x (B+F)/T = V.
Where S is the shape, C is sphericity, B is muscular bounce, F is firmness, T is the skin texture / cellulite amount and V is the hip to waist ratio or symmetry. At least this is the method from Dr David Homes from Manchester Metropolitan University.
What you do is assess each factor on a scale of 1-20 and plug the results into the equation. The perfect score is seemingly 80. Now, I haven’t tried to use this yet, and it would seem to be adding too much subjectivity to do a reasonable assessment (um, or ass-essment, sorry!) from a photo. I think bounce, firmness and texture can only be accurately and precisely gauged by extended tactile means.
What bothers me about this most is that when I was studying the female bottom on an amateur basis while struggling at University to understand Stokes’ Law and it’s application in terms of Long Shore Drift, there were other people actually trying to research and understand the perfect bottom – professionally. Now that is a damn fine use of mathematics and a research grant. I am jealous.
Needless to say accuracy can only be ascertained with a very large sample population in this case.
Dr Holmes, if I were on the Nobel Prize committee I’d honor you – Peace Prize maybe?. Still, I’m sure your work is just rewards.
There’s no-one I can find in the news today who’s ass is interesting to write about. There’s Britney and Paris, but even if either had nice asses – which they currently don’t – I have little to say about them.
So I thought I’d go for hunt on Flickr and see what I could find. The results weren’t bad, there’s some nice ass on there. However, the process was not fun. I’d never used Flickr prior to it being owned by Yahoo, and rarely afterward, since I am of the opinion that Yahoo is one of the World’s most aptly named firms (somebody really should have checked the meaning of that name before they used it, however I now relish its metaphor and is wholly deserved).
The few good pics I’ve found was the result of a few hours of casually searching. It was pretty painful. Were I not dedicated to the pursuit of the perfect bottom, I wouldn’t have bothered. Their meta tag system either doesn’t work that well – or I am incompetent at using it. Not to mention that when one searches for “ass” one gets pictures of donkeys too. Oh, how the uploaders of those pics must laugh. Dicks.
Some of these may Not be particularly Safe for Work, you have been forewarned.
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I read somewhere recently that Kirsten topped a poll of “women you’d like to see naked” I forget who published the poll.
I wouldn’t necessarily be one to argue, although I’ve never entirely seen her in that light. I do however thinks she is a great actress, on what used to be at least a great show. I say “used to be” because whatever the CW has done to this show doesn’t work for me. I found the first two seasons to be gripping, intelligent, extremely well written and masterfully performed. Season three is really lacking the tension, urgency, edge and excitement of the previous two. It’s much more tame and soapy.
Anyway, back to the back of Miss Bell. It’s hard to find good pictures of her from behind, however these ones do her justice.












































































