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I have yet to make it through the second movie. I didn’t expect to enjoy the first movie, although I did. Johnny Depp stole the first movie but wasn’t enough to save the second.

Women may loathe her, and the red top press may be obsessed with her weight, but The Quest still likes her. Keira has a beautiful bum and elegant breasts. At some distant point in the future she may even learn to act, you never know.

I have no expectations for Pirates of the Caribbean – At the Worlds End. Obviously, it will be far superior to the second one if I can make to the end of the movie. It’s a Disney movie so there won’t be any bodice ripping – shame, because in addition to Keira, it’s worth keeping a weather eye peeled for Natalie Victoria.

Natalie seems to be getting a great deal of quiet attention building around her at the moment. I like what I see, so likely we will be taking a closer look at her, very soon.

In the meantime, enjoy some very British buttcrack and t-bar thong action.

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Hammer Horror is back. For those of you who don’t know, this is a British company that produced cheap camp horror movies throughout the 1960s and 1970s. Without this company Christopher Lee wouldn’t be famous.

Their movies were, in many ways, bad. Which is not to say that they were unwatchable. Think Shaw Brothers, think Tarantino.

What they did have, as you can see illustrated here, was a great deal of vulnerable young victims gratuitously naked. There was often a hint of lesbianism too.

The company died in the late 70s. However, it has now risen from the dead. The possible bad news is that is has been bought by Dutch “Big Brother” creator John de Mol.

This may mean überchav Jade Goody has the potential to be hired as a flesh eating creature of the night – presumably white meat only though. No make-up necessary.

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  • More Big Brother Botty HERE

Is it just me, or does Mischa bear more than a passing resemblance to one of the Grays? Could she be extraterrestrial? Well, if there’s going to be any anal probing to be done…

Mischa’s bottom certainly looks human. Have a nipple slip too, just for kicks.

The Yankee’s pitching woes have been getting most of the media attention in the past few weeks. There is, however, another tragic tale that is affecting the Yankees.

Right Fielder Bobby Abreu used to have a relationship with Alicia. She’s a former Miss Universe. And, as you can see clearly here, the only Miss Universe to have posed naked for Playboy.

My understanding is that Alicia was on some Mexican reality TV show – something like Big Brother – and she pretty much had sex with some guy on live TV. Classy dame huh?

Bobby’s been slumping ever since.

Cheer up Bobby! You’re rich and talented, and your team’s just signed The Rocket. From what I can see, her ass is above the Mendoza line but it’s no single season Home Run record.

There’s much nicer ass out there that’ll be a classier match for your 2007 World Series ring.

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Good news everyone! The Parisite is in jail. The bad news is that’s she’s getting out again in 45 days.

Still maybe someone can smuggle in a camcorder – there’s a great deal of potential for another sex tape. An interesting one this time.

Nice ass, shame about every single other aspect of her existence.

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  • Paris’ Bare Bottom HERE

I’m not making this up. Seems that there’s another movie version of “The Other Boleyn Girl” in the pipeline.

With the success and utter brilliance of “The Tudors”, you might be inclined to think, “why?” I know that was the first thing to go through my mind. Who could the cast and director be that would rival that which Showtime put together?

The Other Boleyn Girl is not going to be any quality match for The Tudors. Although, sadly, it may be more financially successful, thanks to its cast. Namely Natalie, and Scarlett Johansson.

Which only goes to show how fickle the human race really is. Neither of these girls is much of an actress, and Scarlett in particular has shown that she’s no flair for accents, nor is she really bright enough to deliver lines that are literary or polysyllabic. Scarlett’s performance in The Black Dahlia could not have been more wooden.

To be fair to Natalie though, it could be that she has potential as an actress, but just has had dreadful roles. It’s hard to say, at least until she works with someone talented.

She has a pretty face, and more to the point, I do like her bum – albeit a little hippier than one might expect. Again, a buttcrack pic always persuades me.

Enjoy these pole dancing moments from “Closer” the only bright spots in what was otherwise a dreadful movie.

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I hate Fox!!!

Like I said in my previous post on Drive, I am still angry about Firefly. Now, I am also angry about Drive. It got canceled today after only 4 episodes broadcast.

Fox executives are wholly retarded. Sure, they commission great shows. With both Firefly and Drive you had some of the singular best talent ever gathered together on TV, and not to mention some of the hottest ass on the planet. Then they screw up the marketing or the scheduling. Bang! They cancel before a show’s had the chance to gather momentum.

Seriously, is this good investing? Do they have no understanding of economics?

Or, is it simply that the average Fox viewer is retarded, and can’t therefore cope with a Whedon or Minear written script. Hence the low ratings? I do have more faith in the viewer than Fox Execs. Hmmm… although… 24’s success could be possible evidence for that hypothesis.

Look at the truly amazing ass of Miss Monroe. We will now be deprived of that object of wonder, along the amazing asses of the other ladies on the show, and the great acting, and the great writing. Until the next time. Until the next show that Fox won’t understand.

A letter writing campaign? That implies Fox executives can read. Think this is the way to go? I don’t.

One of the curious things about people who work for Fox – and I have met a few on my travels – is that they are usually reticent about telling you who their employer is, or cough in an embarrassed way when they mention the name. It’s easy to understand why.

Fox sucks. Did I mention that?

Here’s my previous post on Drive. I hope it helps.

Poor Shilpa. She seems to be inadvertently at the center of another scandal.

This innocent and talented Indian princess was las year the victim of racism at the hands of some of the trashiest, ignorant, talentless, ugliest and fattest vermin in UK society.

This time she’s a scandal back home thanks to being kissed in public by Richard Gere. Richard now has a warrant issued for his arrest. While I hate public displays of affection as much as the next person, there is nothing I hate more than censorship.

Censorship is pure evil. It is always pure evil. It breeds evil. It allows evil to flourish by driving it underground. Sorry India, but we won’t agree about this. Richard and Shilpa are innocent.

Here’s some beautiful pics of Shilpa’s magnificent and regal rear. Please also take a moment to enjoy the cameltoe clearly visible thanks to those tight sports pants.

More on Shilpa’s previous scandal HERE with more botty pictures of course.

Of course I only vaguely know who she is. You know by now I’ve no knowledge of pop music.

I know she tried to be an actress and didn’t seem to cut it – hard to tell how good she was from the minuscule screen time she had on The Aviator.

I think out of principle, I object to the the idea of pop icon turned “actor” anyway. It take years of work to become a good actor, never mind a great one – and it seems unfair that a role should go to a flavor of the month rather than someone who’s worked hard. It rarely works out anyway – Britney was as bad on screen as she is on record (or any other medium). Sting? Anyone care to defend that?

There are two reasons why I try to avoid pop icons here. Firstly, as aforementioned, I sit here writing whilst listening to Avro Pärt’s 3rd Symphony. This, I know about – pop music not so much.

Secondly, and more importantly, the music industry is pure unfettered evil.

There’s no way that I, in however a small way, want to be responsible for giving those assholes any more money. It’s not just the Payola, nor the soul sucking contracts that screw over young bands, nor the blandness and inanity of most of the accountant defined products, nor is it their Ozymandian fascination with DRM (DRM is theft – pure and simple), nor is it the protection racket tactics of the RIAA and their disgusting lawsuits.

It is actually for reasons such as Sony BMG. The BMG part used to be Bertelsmann until a couple of years ago. This is a German music company that in the 30s and 40s used Jewish slaves and promoted Na.zi songs and music – undoubtedly directly and indirectly responsible for the deaths and suffering of a great many people. They lied and hid this from view, until they were found out in a buy-out in 2002.

These are the people who run much of the music business. That’s why I avoid it. My advice I guess is, buy music direct from the artist, or second hand if you must buy it at all.

Ok, rant over…

I don’t think Gwen’s and especially attractive woman from the front . However, from the rear I like what I see. Some of those pics are post partum too, so she did a great job of staying in shape. Those jeans and the black pants describe a perfect plumlike posterior.

Some stars pass me by. Eva is one of them. I have seen nothing of her work. Nope, not a single frame. So I can give you no opinion as to her talent.

I do know that she’s marrying a basketball star, Tony Parker, soon – though not being a basketball fan I’ve no idea who he is either.

However, judging by this round and symmetrical little peach she’s sporting on her rear I should perhaps check more of her work out.

Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan or Eva? Or all three?

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