I should have thought of this earlier. Helen of Troy. In fact it only occurred to me while watching Poseidon the other day. Troy and Poseidon share the same director, namely Wolfgang Peterson.

Although it’s hard to tell. Please do not waste any time watching Poseidon. That’s and hour and a half I’ve lost forever. There’s no nice bottoms in it – despite the fact that it has attractive actresses who spend the majority of the film wet. They are extremely unsexy throughout. There is talent throughout the movie, unfortunately it seems that this didn’t include the writer or the producers. It’s one of those we-did-it-for-the-money-movies, and it stinks of it, so don’t give them any.

Anyway, Troy is a much better movie, still not a patch on Das Boot, but better nonetheless.

Wolfgang, according to IMDb, didn’t want to cast Helen because no actress could live up to the role. He was right. Diane was cast regardless. Although she is pretty, her performance is awful. She narrowly missed getting a Razzie for worst supporting actress for this movie. I feel she was unfairly overlooked.

During the few lines she has her accent wobbles noticeably. Helen, to have been the woman that caused such a long and bitter war, must have been more than simply physically beautiful. Diane doesn’t seem to be. She lacks charisma, she lacks passion, she lacks warmth, she lacks soul, she lacks humor. She’s just, well… stereotypically German; not in the least Greek. Her face may launch a thousand ships, but in the first sign of adversity those same ships would turn back. She wouldn’t be worth the effort. With Modeling she would have kept the mystery, acting spoils that for good.

However, a fine ass she does indeed have. Here it is in its naked splendor for you to enjoy.

Diane 1
Diane 2
Diane 3

More Diane HERE